Schwarzenegger films would trigger FCC equal time rule

The airing of “Total Recall” or another Schwarzenegger film, or a repeat of a “Diff’rent Strokes” episode with Gary Coleman on broadcast television in California would trigger the Federal Communications Commission’s equal time provision, allowing other candidates to demand the same amount of time.

Cable channels are not covered by the FCC rule, which in the past kept reruns of “Death Valley Days” off the air while Ronald Reagan ran for president. A repeat of a “Saturday Night Live” episode featuring Don Novello, aka Father Guido Sarducci, on cable, for instance, would not trigger the provision.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you read that right. Ahhhhnold, Gary Coleman, and now Father Guido Sarducci are all in the California Recall election.

I’ve come to the conclusion that making shit up is useless when reality steals all the best punchlines.