{"id":462,"date":"2002-08-27T02:27:32","date_gmt":"2002-08-27T09:27:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/?p=460"},"modified":"2002-08-27T02:27:32","modified_gmt":"2002-08-27T09:27:32","slug":"its-getting-so-i-cant-even-make-this-stuff-up-anymore","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/?p=462","title":{"rendered":"It&#039;s getting so I can&#039;t even make this stuff up anymore&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I think I&#8217;ve mentioned this before, but for those of you who didn&#8217;t believe me, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thesmokinggun.com\/\">The Smoking Gun<\/a> have a copy of the police report from New York in which a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thesmokinggun.com\/archive\/starcrush1.shtml\">Canadian man is suing Starbucks<\/a> because he somehow crushed his&#8230;er&#8230;manhood&#8230;in the toilet seat.<\/p>\n<p>The thoughtful people at TSG visited the scene of the &#8220;crime&#8221;, and have helpfully snapped a Polaroid of the defendant.  Which leaves me to ask the question&#8230;how in the hell could this guy poss&#8230;I mean, it&#8217;s a&#8230;.oh, I give up.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I think I&#8217;ve mentioned this before, but for those of you who didn&#8217;t believe me, The Smoking Gun have a copy of the police report from New York in which a Canadian man is suing Starbucks because he somehow crushed his&#8230;er&#8230;manhood&#8230;in the toilet seat. The thoughtful people at TSG visited the scene of the &#8220;crime&#8221;, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-462","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2hxip-7s","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/462","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=462"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/462\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=462"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=462"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.m-dnovember.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=462"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}